Games

Love hurts...

It has been a long time since I posted. Some of the reason was bc I endured many peeves as of late. The other reason is simply that I have been busy. However, during this  hiatus I changed my career, address, and relationship status.

The relationship status is what sparked me to post here again. As many well know I am now divorced,which means I have reentered the dating scene. It is no longer as it was 20 years ago when I got married. Now it's a bitter untrusting cyberworld.

So here are just a couple of things I found in determining if a man is a player:
1. If he in anyway "loves" you before you meet or very early on. Examples of how he does this are "accidentally" slipping and saying love then switching to like in a phrase about you or saying "I could love you". The best is just outright saying, "I love you" especially via text even though you haven't even met or maybe talked on the phone. It's ridiculous that they believe you are that stupid.
2. He has more than 1 or 2 female friends he regularly hangs out with, aka movie nights or sports events, or bar nights. These "friends" are even more likely to be more if he says they have never slept together or if he always goes with them without you. If his female friend is truly just that he will feel no need to hide if they had a past because it's past and she will be fine with all 3 of you going to a club or dinner and probably has her own someone to bring.
3. He calls you "baby" all the time. This maybe used as a term of endearment if used in moderation but overkill can be him covering his rear as to not slip and make a name mistake.
4. He very specifically details his whereabouts on nights he's not with you yet is defensive when you ask a simple question. Example would be he told you he went to his guy friend's to watch football and got $15 in gas on the way; they had pizza from Pizza Hut and he decided to pick up deodorant at Wal-mart on the way home because he was out in his locker at work. Then when you ask something simple like, "Did your brother go with you?" or "Did you see (intert mutual friend who works at Wal-mart)?" he blows up with how he doesn't have to tell you everything or he doesn't have time to pay attention or chat at the store.

Wedding Bells

So, my last two posts fell into the “peeve” category, so it is time for me to post a “glee”.  The subject I have chosen has been heavily in the news as of late with Chelsea Clinton, Megan Fox, and Carrie Underwood sharing theirs.  Weddings -stay with me guys, I know you are hopeless romantics underneath (besides my goal is something for everybody).  Whether it is your own or someone else’s, the witness to a union of true love just makes you feel good.  

It seems that at a gathering of friends and family, as those enchanting vows of love are spoken, the world could exist in a fairy tale.  Maybe it is the elegant dresses, extravagant cake, or lovely flowers, but more likely it is the idea of sharing in the construction of a family.  No matter how large, how small, or what constancy it feels as if you are partaking in a tiny piece of history. 

 Notice I said ‘true’ love; there is always that couple that is not meant to be and everyone knows it but them.  Generally, however, once a pair makes it far enough that they plan their event and invite witnesses it is something to at least give the benefit of the doubt and celebrate their happiness in hopes that it lasts.  

It seems that I used to attend at least one wedding each summer, but now they are becoming fewer and farther between.  Is it because the emphasis on “holy matrimony” is wearing thin?  I still know just as many unwed people as always, they just seem less interested in making it official, but my brother, FINALLY, after 12 years with his girlfriend is planning a big shah-bang this October.  I am so excited for them.  This is a union meant to last and they have established a track record as proof. 

I have attended both weddings deserving of rejoicing and those destined by doom.  We usually know whether a marriage is immediately off on the wrong foot or will last a while, even if not forever.  Sometimes we even choose whether we will attend the wedding or not based on how much we support the couple in their endeavor.  The atmosphere of a wedding that was simply destined is different for everyone involved, right down to the guests and being the guest at a fairy tale wedding where the new husband and wife just know there is no one else out there for them because they have found “The One” lends a sense of balance to the world.

Why more people seem to be steering clear of making their combination official is unclear to me, but friends and family alike enjoying getting a glimpse of that pure happiness, devoted love, and piece of , at least, family history.  Perhaps it is seeing that it can happen, or that they can hope to achieve such bliss, or they are reliving their happy day of matrimony.  Whatever the reason weddings can create a wealth of positive feelings we all can appreciate.