Games

Love hurts...

It has been a long time since I posted. Some of the reason was bc I endured many peeves as of late. The other reason is simply that I have been busy. However, during this  hiatus I changed my career, address, and relationship status.

The relationship status is what sparked me to post here again. As many well know I am now divorced,which means I have reentered the dating scene. It is no longer as it was 20 years ago when I got married. Now it's a bitter untrusting cyberworld.

So here are just a couple of things I found in determining if a man is a player:
1. If he in anyway "loves" you before you meet or very early on. Examples of how he does this are "accidentally" slipping and saying love then switching to like in a phrase about you or saying "I could love you". The best is just outright saying, "I love you" especially via text even though you haven't even met or maybe talked on the phone. It's ridiculous that they believe you are that stupid.
2. He has more than 1 or 2 female friends he regularly hangs out with, aka movie nights or sports events, or bar nights. These "friends" are even more likely to be more if he says they have never slept together or if he always goes with them without you. If his female friend is truly just that he will feel no need to hide if they had a past because it's past and she will be fine with all 3 of you going to a club or dinner and probably has her own someone to bring.
3. He calls you "baby" all the time. This maybe used as a term of endearment if used in moderation but overkill can be him covering his rear as to not slip and make a name mistake.
4. He very specifically details his whereabouts on nights he's not with you yet is defensive when you ask a simple question. Example would be he told you he went to his guy friend's to watch football and got $15 in gas on the way; they had pizza from Pizza Hut and he decided to pick up deodorant at Wal-mart on the way home because he was out in his locker at work. Then when you ask something simple like, "Did your brother go with you?" or "Did you see (intert mutual friend who works at Wal-mart)?" he blows up with how he doesn't have to tell you everything or he doesn't have time to pay attention or chat at the store.

Fitness Made Easier

I am on a roll with the “glees” recently.  Last week, I discovered a free website that offers many features to assist in healthy living at www.sparkpeople.com.  Here you can track calories, carbs, and fat, as well as steps, minute and distance of different workouts. From fitness to nutrition this site has it all and you get to personalize your settings, including your goals.  So whether you are trying to lose weight or lower your blood pressure, there is a plan for you.

The site offers many similar benefits of its pricey competitors, but unlike weight Watchers and Nutri-system, Spark People does not require a membership fee or meal purchases.  Rather, this site will plan your meals, allowing you to substitute due to taste preferences and budget, and then it will even break it down into a grocery list for you. 

Eating healthy sound expensive?  At Spark People you can even set a budget that fits you.  The site does it all, even design work outs or lets you create your own.  Also, there is no calorie figuring, the site is preset for each food you eat, even if it is not in your plan, you can add it. (Let me say it is accurate against the packaging).   

All of your activities are tracked so you can see your progress as you go, not just at the end of a week or day.  You can also earn points to spend on items like pedometers or t shirts and read the latest health news, search tips for your goals, and join groups and blogs. 

Whether your goal is as simple as drinking more water today or reading from a motivational book, or more complicated like losing 30 pounds this site will fit your needs.  I am not saying this because I get rewarded for promoting the site, I read at U.S. News health that “Participants in a study … who entered their meals and physical activity in online diaries at least once a month for roughly two years were more likely to lose weight—and keep it off—than others who did so less diligently.”  Read the full article at http://health.usnews.com/health-news/diet-fitness/diet/articles/2010/08/03/5-weight-loss-websites-that-work . 

I have lost 3 pounds since I began tracking a week or so ago.  Spark People makes me more aware of what I really eat and at the end of the day when my tracker says I only have 2 grams of fat left in my daily allowance, I skip the ice cream I may have had before.  It makes your diet and fitness goals more visible.  I do not like when I look at the day and it says I only did half of the exercise I planned, then charts it on a line graph with a sharp dip that I slacked a day. 

It takes self motivation too, but this tool will help and it’s FREE.  For those that need more than self motivation, utilize the blogs and support groups.  I have never tried weight watchers, but I have seen signs for their meetings and Going online has to be easier than coordinating with others to meet in a church basement.  Go try it and be sure to let me know what you think. 

Good Will in a Time of Need

            In today’s world every penny counts.  With the poor economy it becomes harder and harder to find true benefactors, but lately it seems to be becoming a trend to help those in need. 

Today, the late Johnny Carson was on my homepage due to a generous contribution to charity.  Last week, I read about Warren Buffett and Bill Gates giving much of their fortunes to charity in an attempt to kick-start the economy. 

These are wonderful changes that our front runners of economic developments are starting, hopefully setting an example for others in our top 10% to share the wealth, and I, in no way, want to minimize their efforts.  They are truly the ones who can have an impact and can save America, however, I would like to offer a “thank you” to the lesser known helpers of humanity.

Here in my hometown there is a very small organization who, even in this dire time for many Americans, maintains a FREE store.  Everything they offer is free.   It is a small store that has clothes, dishes, curtains, shoes, baby things, some food items, and other miscellaneous items.  There is a bulletin board where people can post items they need and items they can spare at no charge so that the goods of society are available to those who need them.

All of the workers in this shop are volunteers, many church people, but some just willing to help because they have the commodity of time to offer.  More than 100 families a week visit the store to get items they need. They travel in from several surrounding counties seeking help of items, prayer, or even counseling.  

Running any business takes money, so how do how do they offer free everything?  Through donations of others who want to help.  What may not seem like much to one may mean the world to another and by putting it all together it becomes a miracle for those in need. 

In today’s world you may not feel as though you have anything to offer, trust me I was in the same boat, but every little bit truly does count when it is for a good cause.  People helping others in this time, or any time, is a “glee” in my book and I want to thank everyone for helping groups, like the one that runs Heaven’s Closet, carry on against the odds.

Wedding Bells

So, my last two posts fell into the “peeve” category, so it is time for me to post a “glee”.  The subject I have chosen has been heavily in the news as of late with Chelsea Clinton, Megan Fox, and Carrie Underwood sharing theirs.  Weddings -stay with me guys, I know you are hopeless romantics underneath (besides my goal is something for everybody).  Whether it is your own or someone else’s, the witness to a union of true love just makes you feel good.  

It seems that at a gathering of friends and family, as those enchanting vows of love are spoken, the world could exist in a fairy tale.  Maybe it is the elegant dresses, extravagant cake, or lovely flowers, but more likely it is the idea of sharing in the construction of a family.  No matter how large, how small, or what constancy it feels as if you are partaking in a tiny piece of history. 

 Notice I said ‘true’ love; there is always that couple that is not meant to be and everyone knows it but them.  Generally, however, once a pair makes it far enough that they plan their event and invite witnesses it is something to at least give the benefit of the doubt and celebrate their happiness in hopes that it lasts.  

It seems that I used to attend at least one wedding each summer, but now they are becoming fewer and farther between.  Is it because the emphasis on “holy matrimony” is wearing thin?  I still know just as many unwed people as always, they just seem less interested in making it official, but my brother, FINALLY, after 12 years with his girlfriend is planning a big shah-bang this October.  I am so excited for them.  This is a union meant to last and they have established a track record as proof. 

I have attended both weddings deserving of rejoicing and those destined by doom.  We usually know whether a marriage is immediately off on the wrong foot or will last a while, even if not forever.  Sometimes we even choose whether we will attend the wedding or not based on how much we support the couple in their endeavor.  The atmosphere of a wedding that was simply destined is different for everyone involved, right down to the guests and being the guest at a fairy tale wedding where the new husband and wife just know there is no one else out there for them because they have found “The One” lends a sense of balance to the world.

Why more people seem to be steering clear of making their combination official is unclear to me, but friends and family alike enjoying getting a glimpse of that pure happiness, devoted love, and piece of , at least, family history.  Perhaps it is seeing that it can happen, or that they can hope to achieve such bliss, or they are reliving their happy day of matrimony.  Whatever the reason weddings can create a wealth of positive feelings we all can appreciate.